Run-and-Gun Fun That's Marred by Mobile Game Failings - Gun & Dungeons Review
Gun & Dungeons is an action-RPG shooter that uses tricks (i.e., switches, moving lasers, etc.) to stage battles on an isometric, quarter-view map. It leans heavily on the run-and-gun, twin-stick shooters of yore—Total Carnage, Smash TV and Robotron. It’s nowhere near as entertaining (or as elegantly designed) as these classics, but what it does, it does well.
So it seems I’m a nameless pixel lad with a rather large arsenal blasting through hordes of repetitive enemies in my hunt for loot—loot that I can then use to upgrade my weapons and equipment. My mission is to survive as long as possible so I can be whisked away to the next dungeon. This is child’s play at the outset, but gradually becomes more difficult, only to reach absurd levels. This, of course, is by design as a way to get me to start spending actual money on upgrades via the dreaded microtransactions.
To be clear: I didn’t have to buy anything in Gun & Dungeons...but developer Miniclip has a vested interest in me gnashing my teeth and screaming out loud. And why wouldn’t I be? I didn’t have a chance in hell against the boss who shot target-seeking death robots at me as if there was no tomorrow...unless I gave in and purchased a few upgrades. I steadfastly refused, however. The problem with my inflexible attitude is that I died. And died. And died. And died...ad infinitum.
Every time I wanted to play a new dungeon, it cost five energy units, and I only started with twenty. When that energy was depleted, I had to wait. And wait. And wait. It takes fifty minutes for Gun & Dungeons to refill five units of energy, which is enough for one round only. Now this is a game that, at the higher levels of difficulty, lasts somewhere between two and five minutes. Obviously even a full twenty units isn’t going to last very long. Of course, I could spend real cash to replenish my energy immediately, and sixty crystals (Gun & Dungeons’s premium currency) only costs $1. But why stop there? I could just as easily pay $5 for as many as five hundred crystals, right? These deals never ceased to annoy me when they popped up—as if they were poisonous mushrooms bursting through the ground immediately after a rainstorm. It’s never-ending: limited time offers to buy a special package for $10, or maybe a secret gift for the low, low price of $29.99? Only today. Tomorrow, it’ll be gone! But of course it won’t really...because there will just be brand-spankin’ new offers in the shop.
When I arrived at boss fights, Gun & Dungeons generously offered me the chance to replenish my health or to choose a power-up before the fight began. Those power-up purchases would only apply to that fight, of course. And hey, if I did not have enough crystals to pay for said offer, then I could watch a thirty-second commercial instead. It pissed me off to no end watching the same crap commercial for another greedy mobile game for the tenth time. At moments like these, I had never felt closer to D-Fens in Falling Down, furious and ready to blow up the outside world, but somehow, I held back my bile and soldiered on.
When playing the “Story Mode” I couldn’t help but wonder: Where’s the story? There is no story in Gun & Dungeons. Sure, there might be a vague outline that was cooked up to slap on the digital storefront landing page, but all I saw was a gateway to infinite heaps of loot. No narrative was ever conveyed to me.
I picked up a pair of cool glasses to decorate my nameless pixel lad, but I felt “meh” about it at best. A “Legendary” plasma weapon, you say? Don’t mind if I do! It’s then that a hint of that familiar gamer’s rush began to tickle my brain...until I discovered that this gun was completely useless unless I dedicated myself to upgrading it across twenty steps that, of course, cost money or time. So I switched back to my corny standard weapon and plowed ever onward. I moved my finger around the screen to control my nameless pixel lad and released it to let the weapon fire itself. Yes, Gun & Dungeons is pretty much a self-playing game. That’s all I did: run about, dodge, and release. Skitter around some more and release. And I sat here in my gaming reverie, wondering: Why couldn’t I have a second virtual stick so I could control where I was firing?
All that being said, Gun & Dungeons is not really a bad game. It plays just fine, and it is skillful entertainment in a fleeting moment or two. It’s perfect for a car trip or on a lunch hour, with pleasant pixel graphics that have a nice flow and music that is quite fitting. The pay-to-win mechanics just took me right out of it. The whole “free-to-play” setup can be a good thing, sure, but it is abused in this experience. To be fair, Gun & Dungeons isn’t really worse than many other mobile games and their shameless business models, but it has to end at some point, doesn't it?
SCORE: 3 STARS OUT OF 5
PLAY IF YOU LIKE:
• Smash TV. Gun & Dungeons will never be mentioned in the same breath as one of Midway’s best games (except by me...), but its digital DNA can definitely be traced back to the Smash TV source.
💬 Have you played Gun & Dungeons? Let us know what you think of it in the comments! Even if you haven't played it, leave a comment sharing your thoughts on your favorite run-and-gun titles!
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